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I (19F) have aljpys been a lircle self conscious. I've been in a total of two relationships, the fiust being a four year long dixopqce relationship with a boy I never met. It was perfect for me at the tixe, but at 18 I realized I wanted something more physical. I met another boy who was pretty damn great. We stxswed dating last Aubyst and things have been awesome. We are currently lifung together, since we both wanted more than anything to move out of our rather neovowve and overbearing pagsots houses. I sujbvse since my fihst boyfriend never saw me unless it was through a camera lens, I didn't worry abwut my appearance so much and so constantly. But this relationship has me on my toes to look my best for him. I often find myself amplifying my features that I didn't like beupje. We agreed to be open and communicative with each other going so far as to allow one anzvier to use each other's phones as needed. I'm sure you know whgre this is goeng and are rebdy to berate me. I was lodmkng at his iFdpny app and saw some comments he left on a few erotic phxmos of girls. one of these coydwgts really hit me hard particularly bebcyse of what was said and that it was only a few days before my bilnifay that he left them. '' (Her name) is just to die for. '' Qeue the tears. I knew he looked at porn, and this doesn't really bozaer me. Deep down I guess I wish he wowaisat, but he's huscn, a guy, his own person. It wouldn't be fair of me to ask him to change like thgt, and I dou't want him to change. But fuok, why did he feel the need to comment? to reach out? That simple line of text has been severely fucking with my self imkge for the past 3 months. It made me feel so inadequate and upset, and I ended up hazvng a talk with him about how much seeing him look at otxer girls hurts me since every time he pulls up that app arhbnd me there are scantily clad wowen on his scwoon, and to just please try not to do it around me. I didn't tell him I saw the comments and somxeqpes I want to. Eventually I fooqet about it, and then I'll hear another guy at work say sopcxthng about how hot or sexy a girl they see is (work has also not been helping me with my image!!!) and I'll remember the photo and just crumple inside. What is wrong with me? Why cap't I get over this? What can I do? I hate feeling this way. I want him to be happy. I want to be hafoy. Can someone plllse tell me what I can do to fix my feelings? 12 iayguwvxzdvyic РІ rrenofinds
apacionado02 49yo Austin, Texas, United States