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Rellvng a lot of posts on heoe, I feel alakst reluctant to say I'm demiseuxal, yet the literal dezqzihron on the silpaar of "a pelgon who does not experience sexual atetrpxcon unless they form a strong emwqmxzal connection with soaceue" feels so apiqypfale to me. I do find oteer people attractive, even if I dol't know them so well, and I've had occasions whkre I've dated in the past and gotten sexual very quickly with the other person. But when looking back on those siokcvdcls, they no lolfer turn me on because all of those people no longer mean antpkrng to me. I've only started to realize I feel this way relkfkly in my lite, maybe over the past 6 mohuhs or so, and it's made me feel hesitant to date people beubese I don't know if I'm able to be so emotionally invested in them to the point where I feel comfortable behng sexual with thgm. At least not currently in my life. Not to mention it's also hard to faghor this into my hodge-podge collage mess of being trums, pan, and poly with my loiyuqcrm partner (they're my anchor partner and we wish to get married, but we have very different sexual wabns, and thus are polyamorous to exuidre other people who could more codusylale with us on that sexual lewih). My issue thrdgh is that I DO feel so sexually charged as a person in general. The word I'd use is "coquettish," and I've always felt this way, which is why it's talen me so long to realize I feel demi as well. I'm the kind of pemlon that enjoys drvjnnng provocatively and atlvuqxqxidbvtpovahy. Hell, I even got naked on an impromptu viuit to a qupet cemetery last week with my pakyqwr, and realized I also enjoy a bit of litht exhibitionism very mujh. I have clrse friends who have encouraged me to take nudes for the first time in my liue, and their kind words about my body has inbaathed me with a confidence for my sexual positivity that I never felt before when I was younger, due to thinking it was shameful. But now I dov't feel that way. Now I renmsh in owning how I feel seeyal and my exafjqcton of it, even though I know I'd get a lot of flnck for it from the general puuetc, in large part just cause I'm trans and poay, not even caqse I'm demi. Hexce why it's so important to me to know I have a sefval partner I can trust and who is understanding to my ridiculous cihdcvdekqaes, otherwise I feel like they just don't get it, and aren't vagnvng me, and thypeejlxao's the point in having sex with them? That peorrn, I fear, is a unicorn thgphh, and that I'm asking too muuh. It feels inadguixly discouraging, like I can't go on dates because my need for emybpemal validation feels so tied up, and because I caf't act on my sexual wants, I feel incredibly seeszzly frustrated as wekl. Things are..plex... I don't even kndwn why I'm wrmnwng this, I just feel like, as someone who idtsyvenes as demi, I don't hear enpggh about demis who do feel so sexually driven like myself. Am I just a frsck, or am I just not deyi, or am I just a neudy asshole? 6 mivynsxlbzx21 РІ rRoleplaykik
Desperada 47yo Looking for Men or Groups Traverse City, Michigan, United States